jokes

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linford christie walks in to golf club and a bloke says sorry we dont allow blacks in here there is another club 10 mins down road.
linford says but i am linford christie ,bloke says ok 3 mins now **** off


young lass says to her mum ,do babies come out from where boys put there penis,s "yes "says her mam
"but wont that break my jaw :lol: :lol:

nurse fetches a black baby in to show white father ."is this your baby sir"
"proberly she ******* burns every thing" :lol: :lol:

one for you paddies

english irish and scots man having a chat
em says "my son was born on st george day so i called him george"
sm says "my son was born on st andrews day so i called him andrew "
im says "thats unbelievable wait till i tell our pancake" :lol: :lol:
 
7 dwarfs go to see pope
they all shove dopey up saying "ask him dopey ask him"
dopey asks "do you have nuns where you live"
pope says "yes"
other six dwarfs "go on dopey ask him"
dopey asks"do you have black nuns"
pope "yes"
"go on dopey ask him ask him" say other dwarfs
dopey "do you have midget nuns"
pope says " no"

other dwarfs "DOPEY ****** A PENGUIN ,DOPEY ****** A PENGUIN..."



hunch back ,tom thumb and cinderella go to see god ,tom says i bet i am the smallest person in the world
cinders "i bet i am the prettyest in the world"
hunchback "i bet i am the uglyest"

tom comes out all happy"he says i am the smallest person in the world)
cinders comes out "he says i am the prettyest in the world"
hunchback comes out"who the ***** kelly osbourne"
 
yeah Jabba of course she would rather be shagging some star wars geek in his late 20's than some 18 year old lad :wink: :wink:
 
a bloke from barnsley goes to jewellers "can tha mek us a gold statue o'mi dog?"jeweller asks"18 carrot?""no ,chewin a bone yer daft ****"
 
Liverpool FC summer transfer fund. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
2 lesbians go to weight watchers.instuctor says you are what you eat .one of lesbians smacks her in mouth and says are you calling me a ****
 
do you think its working - this site has gone a bit 'fruity' in recent weeks :wink:
 
well since spoons has called me a gent i thought i would have to take my rep deeper in to the gutter .

so heres my joke of week

2 unemployed irishmen see a sign in police window."TWO BLACK MEN WANTED FOR RAPE"paddy says "******* ****** get all best jobs" :wink:
 
a airline recently introduced a special half price rate for wives who accompanied there hubbys on buisness trips.expecting good feedback they sent out letters to the wiveswho had used the rates asking how they had enjoyed their trip.letters are pouring in asking WHAT TRIP 8) 8) :lol:
 

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